Something to do with π
Posted by marshall Tue, 28 Feb 2006 13:50:00 GMT
There was an advertisement some years ago for Taco Bell with the tagline, "Make a run for the border." This was presumably intended to suggest the Mexican inspiration for their menu, but I expect most people silently added something like, "And if you can't make it that far, there's always Taco Bell."
Taco Bell and I have been spending some time apart over the past couple of years, largely because right across the street sits El Pollo Loco, home of the Grilled Fiesta Burrito. But lately I've been finding myself drawn to it again. I blame television. My friend Lee has gotten me and some other friends watching "Beauty and the Geek", a show where beer spokesmodels assemble computers and guys who track monkeys with lasers redecorate rooms with such lovable touches as messages on the wall that recall The Shining. The commercial breaks on this fine specimen of entertainment have featured the Crunchwrap Supreme, which sports the exact same few ingredients as every other Taco Bell menu item, yet is hailed as an "innovation in taste." On one night of weakness (as if watching Ashton-Kutcher-produced reality TV on the WB wasn't enough), this item looked startlingly good to me. And so it began.
As can be expected, the Crunchwrap Supreme wasn't anywhere near as good as the commercial made it look, but it reminded me that I really did like going to Taco Bell once upon a time. It also introduced me to the Caramel Apple Empanada, which, like most of the Bell's creations, shares little in common with its namesake, but is rather enjoyable if you take it for what it is. It reminds me somewhat of the old fried apple pies at McDonald's. I recently was seized with a craving for those things, and in my madness I came across a web site that cataloged the remaining McDonald's locations that carried the fried wonders. One of them was the Wal-Mart in Rancho Cucamonga. Imagine, all this time, I was a mere half hour away from oil-soaked apple goodness! But alas, sad news awaited me when I arrived at said Wal-Mart last night: on February 1st, the McDonald's there "went corporate" and switched to the accursed baked variety. I very nearly wept openly. Wal-Mart disappoints again.
So, for now, my apple-filled fried fast food fix will have to be satisfied at Taco Bell. Should I be glad for the ultimately disappointing commercial? Should I abandon the quest for the classic golden arches fried pie? Should I continue pondering what separates a Double Decker Taco from a Crunchwrap in terms of taste innovation? I'd ask for comments, but I know I'd just get invitations to poker sites in return. Lousy spammers. I hope you're happy you've ruined the internet. Well, no I don't. I hope your business fails and your buildings get crushed by burning trees but you escape unscathed to lead a better life because I really don't mean you any personal harm. I just wish those spamming energies went into something more productive, like cataloging the McDonald's restaurants that still sell apple danishes for breakfast. I seem to recall them being similar to the Sara Lee danishes, and nobody doesn't like those.
